OLD PA's WEDNESDAY CLUB
The Never Ending Diet (Tour 1)
|I lost a pound!|
THE BAND - The Weight
I was about twenty when I went on my first diet. It was not that I was fat or anything, it was that I just wanted to be slimmer. In the late sixties it was all tight tapered shirts and skinny topped jeans. I went on the great rage of its day the Scarsdale Diet.
I stopped sugar in my tea and coffee and never went back to it. I lost weight and after about a month I was bang on my target goal. It was easy in these days to loose weight.
Ever since that first diet I have gone up and down weight at regular intervals, I never really became over weight but was never really slim. It had became a way of life.
I have done them all the Scarsdale, The Soup Diet, the Atkins diet, The Beverley Hills diet. You name it I have probably done it at sometime.
I could tell you the calorie content of a peanut or even a witchity grub. Or even how much 30 minutes of cycling would be in calorie loss. Or even 30 seconds of shagging.
It was only when I came back from being abroad in the early nineties that I started to put weight on and over the past few years went up to my peak of 119kilos. At my lowest I would have been 77kilos. Quite a big difference. My height is 6 foot. I kept trying to loose weight during this period but it was really hopeless. My big catch phrase was 'Day one Monday'. There was always a day 1 Monday.
I have been called it all :
'you're fat', 'you will never lose weight', 'you have destroyed your looks'. I even asked people at work to insult me, just to get me going. 'Call me a fat bastard' I said. 'You fat bastard', 'You fat bastard!'
Soon I will tell you how to lose weigh without any pain, by doing my own diet devised after over 45 years of experience. I may even write a book about it, because it works and is currently working.
All you fat bastards out there check out The Never Ending Diet (Tour 2) coming soon.
It may change your life.
Two great selections here, first is the fabulous The Weight by The Band and an incendiary live version Dylan's scary Ballad of a Thin Man.
BOB DYLAN - Ballad of a Thin Man
The Band - 'The Weight' / Bob Dylan - 'The Ballad of a Thin Man'
4/ 5Oleh Old Pa's Corner