Wednesday 6 November 2013

Jackson Browne - The Pretender


Most of the offending pic!

JACKSON BROWNE - The Pretender (1976)

I used to work with this guy who believed he was a bit of a 'ladies man', God's gift to womankind. He thought all the females, young and old fancied him rotten and wanted to be with him. He strutted around with an air of arrogance and confidence. Look at me girls!

If only he knew, mostly they were laughing at him and making fun of him behind his back. He was tailor made for me and I was always trying to set him up. I would encourage him and tell him that so and so really fancies him and he would be 'alright there'. 'She is gasping  for you to ask her out'.

He told us one day that his wife asked him to go to the Newsagent and get one of those Mags that had a centrefold of a man showing of his 'bits' as she wanted to add it to a card she was preparing for some friend of hers.

He got a magazine from the top shelf and was looking at one of the revealing manly pics, when a woman from work, who incidentally was Gay, just happened to walk in and caught a full view of the offending picture.

 'Well Steve is this what you are really into, welcome to our world!'

Steve was mortified!

'But, but it is for my wife'

'Come on Steve, they all say that, you have nothing to be ashamed off.'

Before he came back to the office, everybody new about it and did he take some stick. He even said to me and some other guys

'Tell them that I told you I was going to get if for my wife.'

'Sorry Steve, we don't know what you are talking about'

Sometime later he wanted to take an aptitude test to become a Programmer. He failed the test and was given the report back. Some of the feed back referred to him as having a big ego and being delusional. He could not accept it and was going to complain, until simultaneous voices said all together 'Sorry Stevey boy! the computer got it spot on'.  Beautiful.

It must be great for a person who has this fantastic idea of who they think they are and actually believe it. The world sees them in a completely different way. Just like our Steve.  He was an ok guy really and I did like him.

'You are lazy, selfish, arrogant, irresponsible, childish, you have never grown up, you have a pathetic obsession with Bob Dylan and Andy Murray, you are useless with money, you have a crap sense of humour, you have crap taste in music, your on the computer all day'

'Aw! come on Old Ma, Im not that bad?'.         
JACKSON BROWNE - The Pretender (Live)

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Jackson Browne - The Pretender
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6 November 2013 at 07:03

Poor old Steve. I've known a few like him but I expect many of us end up believing our own publicity. It hurts when we wake up. Great, great song from Mr. Browne.

6 November 2013 at 09:28

When I saw the shot at the top of the post, I thought that Old Ma must've been rummaging around and found another old photo of you!

A great tale that has sparked off a distant memory of my own - post to follow!

6 November 2013 at 09:56

TS/SB thanks of me ..I wish!!Look forward to the post....It hurts when we wake up....great title for a song

6 November 2013 at 21:40

That tale tickled me, Old Pa, I would love to seen his face (but that IS all I'd love to have seen - honest!)

7 November 2013 at 09:13

C- he was quite a good looking lad....I think you would have like him!

8 November 2013 at 16:56

The old 'oh it's not for me' routine. I've genuinely been there but probably best not to go there. However I felt really awkward the time I had to ask for breast pumps at Tesco's at 1am in the morning...I felt I had to justify my request that they were for my wife to avoid getting arrested. Love a bit of Jackson Browne. Breast pumps to extract milk for t'baby in case y'all wondering.

8 November 2013 at 17:50

Shows what I know! I thought it was for cock! Reminds me of Benny an Itallian Girl....she was almost arrrested for asking for penis butter...her boyfriend liked the nutty type.

15 November 2013 at 11:42

I think you've opened a can of worms old pa! Could be another good post, 'dodgy things you've been caught buying for other people'! I remember Steve, couldn't see what it was he thought he had and I worked him out pretty quick too. He thought that Hayley and I fancied him but we were 12 years old and thought he was a poser!
Is it wrong that I think this sounds like Deacon Blue? Not a bad thing though